Quality Time
My sister asked what I wanted for my birthday one year. Without missing a beat, I asked for a dinner out with only her – no kids, no husband, no distractions. I didn’t even want to share the moment with our mother or mutual friends. I only wanted to spend time with my sister. Laugh about old times, have a bit of fun, maybe a drink or two. But mostly, I just wanted to be with her.
Quality Time is something I value and this year that has been taken away on so many levels. I have only been able to spend time with my roommate and one of my colleagues. I am an introvert but too much time to myself is not healthy for me. I tend to get stuck within. Interaction does me good and forces me to focus on others which is oh so important.
I can say one of the things I cherish most with those I care about – spending time with them. Not small talk, we don’t even have to say a word. I want to be with those who are closest to me. Just knowing they are near, that we are together, is enough. I call it together-alone-time. One of my good friends and I will spend the day reading magazines and not talking. Being in one another’s presence is enough. So many wonderful conversations spent without saying a word. It’s one of the simple pleasures I adore, to be known by someone so much that words are not required.
Transversely, I crave deep conversations. Getting to the meat of a subject ignites something in my spirit. Sparring with others, sharing ideas and opinions (even those that differ from mine) help me learn more about the people and world around me. This is the epitome of quality time for me.
Now that the world is slowing opening up (it’s been a longer process in Europe than the States), I’m beginning to plan on spending time with those who I am closest with. I’ve met a few friends for dinner or coffee. I’ve hung out with a friend at her house. I’m slowly letting folks back into my inner circle and allowing for more of the interactions I have been missing. I know things will look different from now on, but I am so glad to start up the rhythms that I feel have been lacking.
How do you like to spend time with others?
What are your love languages? Let me know in the comments below.
Please check out these other blog posts around the theme of quality.
Mom Guilt: The Secret to Getting Past It
https://www.ashleyolivine.com/mom-guilt/
Quality in Relationships